| The Virtues of Hate: A Guide for Parents |
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The Virtues of Hate: A Guide for Parents By Bradford F. Lewis, Ph.D. March 2007 Cleveland, OH - Parents, Grandparents, and Teachers We have been duped! Someone (I wont name any names), keeps telling us that it is wrong to hate. They have put hate on par with the devil. They have made hate worse than Judas Iscariot. Indeed, hate now vies with Hitler for our uh uhmm dare I say, Our hatred. You dont believe me do you? Well lets look at it. One can hardly listen to a discussion of some controversial issue (like homosexuality) without hearing the discussants preface their remarks with, Now I dont hate any one, but or, Im not trying to teach hate, but Aye, the buts have it. Not convinced? When Tim Hardaway was banned from the NBA by Commissioner David Stern, was it because he was charged with raping a hotel clerk? Did he start a fight on National TV with fans? Or sucker punch a fellow player? Did he confess to having thousands of illicit extramarital affairs? No. He did none of these. Far worse (at least by its consequences), he espoused hate. Are you still a skeptic? Recently, while sitting with a group of friends, I spoke out against the prevalence of visible underwear (boys wearing their trousers too low and girls wearing their panties too high). Much to my surprise, I was instantly vilified by the whole group for being of all things a hater. Now, what did hate do to deserve such a bad rap? Ive studied history books; Ive watched C-Span; I even Googled it; and Im hear to tell you that hate did nothing to us. Instead, some slick and wily persons among us (I wont name any names) have gotten us to demonize the emotion of hate. In doing so they have promulgated an atmosphere of hate hate; and that is wrong. What is worse hate hate is detrimental to the very fabric of our society. The Detriments of Hate Hate Hate hate is detrimental in that it tears down the structures that give us civil society. Once this is done we are no longer governed by rules of civility, instead anything goes. In an atmosphere of hate hate we dont criticize lewd dress for fear of exhibiting hatred towards people who dress lewdly. We fail to condemn degenerate music for fear of exhibiting hatred towards the performers of degenerate music. We balk at excoriating inappropriate sexual behavior for fear of exhibiting hatred towards those whose sexual behavior is inappropriate. Hate hate is pervasive; and while it affects more than dress, music and sexual behavior these three should provide clear examples of our present peril. We live in a world where it is common to see styles of dress that are overly revealing and often slovenly, too much of music that is popular can only be characterized as audio pornography, child molesters run rampant, and children are contracting venereal diseases at an alarming rate. The dress, music and sexual behavior that hate hate has given us (and indeed hate hate in itself) is good for neither society nor the individual. An Encouraging Word But I come with an encouraging word. We can turn this mounting tide. We can repair the whole sordid mess that hate hate has given us. How can we do it? you ask. First we must tap into our inner-hater. Thats right. Our inner-hater is one half of an internal barometer that helps us to embrace those things that are good for us and to eschew those things that are bad for us. When we tap into our inner-hater we can identify a range of objects worthy of our hate. Our inner-hater helps us to hate death, disease, and destruction; lying lips, sticky fingers, and an unfaithful heart; ignorance, illiteracy, and irresponsibility; an empty refrigerator, an unsafe neighborhood, and homelessness; disorder, dishonor, and disrespect. In short our inner-hater helps us to hate those things that are bad for us. What should a parent do? First, we need a word of clarification. Hate hate has conditioned us to believe that one could teach hate. Nothing could be more silly. Hate is an emotion like love, fear, envy, joy, etc. We are born with emotions and they cannot be taught. What we can teach is when, towards what objects, and under what conditions we should direct our emotions. This being said, parents should teach their children that hate is not the devil, and that our inner-hater is our friend. Parents should teach their children that, when properly channeled, hate can be a useful emotion. Parents should teach their children to carefully weigh people, places, things and ideas. Parents should teach their children to determine first whether those people, places, things and ideas are good for them or bad for them. Parents should teach their children (after having made this determination) to love (and thereby embrace) those things that are good for them and to hate (and thereby avoid) those things that are bad for them. Finally, parents should teach their children to watch out for anyone (I wont name any names) that would be so unprincipled as to unleash the virus of hate hate on innocent, unsuspecting citizens. Author Note: Bradford F. Lewis, Ph.D. conducts research on the teaching and learning of science. His work includes explorations of students worldview and science career attainment. He is also author of The Greatest Gifts a Parent Can Give. © 2007 by Bradford F. Lewis, Ph.D. About AuthorBradford F. Lewis, Ph.D.Source: ArticleTrader.com |
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